Tag Archives: massage etiquette

Massage client confidentiality

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What does “client confidentiality” mean when it comes to massage therapy?  Many of us are familiar with the concept in terms of a lawyer or counselor, but did you know massage therapists also follow a code of ethics that includes client confidentiality?

If you remember the telephone game from grade school you will recall that even an innocent phrase can become very strange and different by the time it is whispered around the circle.  Since we don’t control what happens to information once it leaves our mouths, we must be very careful not to share too much.

An ethical massage therapist will not tell you about the goofy tattoo her client had last Tuesday.  You won’t hear her holler at Tom about his rock hard glutes across a crowded bar.  If you run into your MT at lunch, she shouldn’t ask how you felt after your last massage.  After all, you might be with your boss, who doesn’t know that half day you took was for your massage appointment.

It’s not that we have anything to hide.  There is obviously nothing shameful about massage.  We just err on the side of caution.  After all, respecting boundaries is an important part of our job.  Respecting your privacy is just as important as respecting your pain tolerance, comfort level and modesty.

What do I wear to my first massage?

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So glad you asked!  Here is the very short answer: As long as you are covered by the sheet when we return to the room, the details are a matter of your comfort.

If you come to our shop, you will likely hear “When I leave the room you will disrobe to your level of comfort.  Everything from completely clothed to completely nude is normal, anywhere in between is fine.  About 50% of folks leave their underpants on, you will be draped modestly during the entire massage”

Some folks snicker when I say that “completely clothed” is normal.  One of my favorite clients of all time heard the above speech.  When I returned I found that he had removed ONLY his shoes and lay there in his button up flannel shirt.  I looked forward to summer, because then I was greeted with short sleeves.  But this was HIS level of comfort.  I did a different sort of massage through clothing, but we were both comfortable.

The important thing to remember is that no matter what you are comfortable with draping WILL be used.  I can’t speak for all states, but here in Missouri, draping is mandatory.  No, you cannot lie on top of the sheets and blankets “necked”.  I have run across a few clients who claim that it is very “American” to be so concerned with privacy and modesty.  Well yes, that’s where we are.  Massage is about warming the muscles, so in addition to modesty, the sheets and blankets we use preserve heat.

Should I leave my underwear on? Up to you, but here are some reasons you might want to leave them on:

A: You are having IT band issues, your hammys are tight and you are hoping your MT will do lots of assisted stretches.  Leaving your drawers on makes it easier for your MT to move your leg around without an uncomfortable breeze.

B: You prefer that your MT work on your glutes through fabric.  Ok by us, we can work through fabric OR avoid any area that you’d rather not have us work on.  Just say so.

C: You don’t want to miss an opportunity to promote Uncle Frank’s used car business, and those Uncle Frank Boxers are the BOMB!

When we say “you will be draped modestly” what do we mean?  We use either a sheet, and a blanket or a towel and generally uncover JUST the part of the body we are working on.  For ladies, this means that when we work on the arms the sheet will be just below the collar bone; for men just below the breast bone (sternum).  For front and back of legs we drape at about wear a swimsuit would hit.  For the back we pull the drape back to the level of underpants.  If we wouldn’t see it on a conservative American beach, we don’t see it in the massage room.

Some ladies feel more comfortable wearing a bra or a sports bra during their session.  Some of the work we do might be a bit less fluid, but your comfort is more important than our convenience.

If you have long hair, putting it in a pony tail or bun on TOP of your head is good.  If you don’t want us to touch your head, please let us know.  Some folks don’t want to have to  “fix their wig”, and we understand.  A hair cap or bandana can help keep things in place if this is a concern.

Socks?  If you have chilly feet you might leave them on during the massage.

So that’s it, in a nutshell.  If we’ve missed anything,  just ask!  Send questions to:

solarismassage@gmail.com

Cancel your appointment, PLEASE!

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I heard once (from a reliable source) that only three things motivate human action:  fear, comfort, and love.  I think this is something advertising people use to promote products; writers use to create believable characters.  Assuming this is true, how do I motivate people to take their appointments as seriously as I do?

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think a massage appointment is as serious as a court date or anything.  Everyone’s time is valuable, however, and I get REALLY protective of the massage therapists who work with me.  Some of these people drive in from the suburbs, put gas in their beaters, and give up OTHER work to be here for appointments.  When we have a no show, I really feel bad for wasting their time.

I also believe that in a face to face interaction, most humans are reasonable.  My sister never used to tip baristas until I explained that the tip jar is a significant part of their income.  She understood why she should tip after I explained that a barista actually does much more than a server (making the food and drink, bringing it to you, busing the table, washing the dishes).

So maybe what’s missing here (in addition to those ne’er-do-well clients) is a little understanding.  I can’t speak for every massage therapist, but I can shed light on what is a very common situation.  When you make an appointment, we reserve that time for you.  In reality, if you make an hour long appointment, we commit two hours (we allow time to ready the room, greet early clients, fill out forms, use the restroom, finish up cash transaction with client, and reset the room after use).  Here’s a real world example: Bob wants a 1pm hour long appointment.  We arrive at 12:30, and finish with Bob at 2pm.  We don’t book our next appointment until 2:30pm.

So if Bob doesn’t show up for his 1pm hour long massage appointment, we have wasted two hours of our work day.  And we don’t have a time machine either people.  If the average work day in America is eight hours, you can see that losing 1/4 of our workday IS significant.  If we don’t have 24 hours notice, we can’t fill that time with work.  If we are not working, that’s right – we don’t get paid.  Most massage therapists are independent contractors, which means that we only get paid for the work we do.

In addition to the two hours we plan to spend at the shop, some therapists travel 20 or 30 minutes for a single appointment.  Yes, you are that important to us!  We love what we do so much, that even if we only have one appointment we will commit a total of up to three hours for it.  We don’t mind doing this, but we need to know if you’re not going to make your appointment.

So back to “fear, comfort, and love”.  If we look at what motivated my sister to change in the case of tipping baristas, I’d call it understanding.  When she understood the value of her action, she changed it.  I think if clients understood the value of a cancellation call, they’d be far more likely to make it.  Perhaps understanding is a form of love.

- Kip